On Sunday night,I had the most beautiful dream.
Erik and I were walking together on this sidewalk,and we came upon a bench where lots of children and adults were sitting. We begin to look around,when we spotted our son being held by a woman. Erik lunged for him,and picked him up,and we were overjoyed to meet our perfect prince! Erik passed him to me,and I remember he was wearing a little white hat,tucked securely around his head. I lifted it up,and saw his beautiful red hair. We met our son!
Upon waking,I was sure that it was God assuring us that we were going to get to our son,that we would meet him and hold him,and love him. I thought the dream was set in the orphanage.
I now know that dream will take place when Erik and I enter Heaven.
Friends, we are deeply saddened and grieved to tell you our sweet baby boy was overcome by his medical needs on Sunday,and passed from this life into the arms of Jesus.
I wish I had something profound to say,but I don't. I am in the trenches of grief right now. I can't wrap words around this,it just hurts.
We loved that little boy SO SO SO much already. He had a nursery decorated with a Noah's Ark theme. He had a name,and bottles,pacifiers,blankets set aside just for him. He had 2 sisters who prayed faithfully for him every morning. They talked about all the things they were going to do with him one he got home. And he had a mommy and daddy who already adored him.
I want to make sure I say this last part. I still believe God is GOOD. I still believe He has a perfect plan for us. We will continue to be obedient to His will,even though we know not where we He is taking us on this journey. My faith will not waver.
May our family lay down everything in surrender for His Glory.