Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Time to talk..1


This is embarrassing. By the way,I always spell the word embarrassing wrong. I have to try it out 4 or 5 times before I get it right. The double rr stumps me.

Oops,I'm really procrastinating here.

What's there to talk about,you ask?

Well,there's not much worse than losing weight,feeling victorious about breaking through a stronghold in your life....

and then gaining (some) back. Or all,I'm sure that's embarrassing,too.

Luckily,I'm not that far in. I haven't gained it ALL back. Or even nearly all,but um,some.

Way more than I am comfortable with.

Ok,I know you want to know numbers. Now,listen,keep in mind a few things when I tell you.

1) I haven't been working out,so while things were tighter before,they are jelly now.
2) It may not seem like a lot,but with the whole jelly thing,my clothes are not fitting well. I am wearing the stretchy pants as fast as I can wash them.

Ok,so quick recap.
Highest weight: 225 (2004-2005)
Starting preg. weight: 215 (both girls 2007-2010)
Hitting the bottom weight: 201 (June 2010)
Deciding to do something about it weight: 197.8 (August 2010)
GOAL: 137.8 (met June 2011)

Ok,so after Erik came home,we had block leave for a month,and went to the beach and I went up a little bit. Then we came home,and I hit my lowest weight (134). Then,we got orders,and were in a hotel,and then stayed at my moms for 2 weeks,and then came here to Alabama (where I went through some depression). I think the breakdown started at my mom's house,where I "let loose" a little bit.

It's like watching a string unravel on your favorite old t-shirt. You know you shouldn't pull it,it will only unravel more. But you do,you pull it,and it does..unravel more.

That's kind of what is happening on my scale. I see it going up,and it's like,well..that's not too bad,I can get back on track tomorrow and fix that. Tomorrow turns into..let's just wait until Monday ( you know,because Monday is always the start day).

Next thing you know,it's been 3 months since you've seen a number resembling 13- on your scale.

Sad,so sad.

Oh wait,I forgot to tell you the number. Right now, 144.
It's been higher,though. Recently,very recently.

So,my question is. What am I going to do about it?

Stay tuned (I'm having a motivational talk with myself,and making a plan of action).

1 comment:

Christa said...

I know the feeling, though I never lost nearly as much weight as you! I started the WW before the holiday and was doing great! Then I got sick. Then I recovered, with a little weight gain. Then I got depressed. And now I can't seem to find the motivation to start dieting again or go to the gym. I'll do great for my diet for breakfast and lunch but by dinnertime I want pizza. I just hope I find some motivation soon before I gain ALL my weight back!